Bride to be part 2

Note for all amateur shoppers:

While shopping at designer malls....don't! The number mentioned on the label is not the bar code. It's the price!!!

Shop Un-holic

It really doesn't help hating shopping when that's the only thing you're supposed to do for the next 3 months.

If I see one more lehenga, one more sari, suit, dupatta, border, embroidery, zari...I'm going to scream! It's like learning about the entire fashion industry in one day! And realising you don't have the knack for colours, designs and you can't afford not to care anymore!

I thought I was supposed to enjoy this phase of my life!!!

If only I didn't have to shop.....

These are a few of my....

Happiness at work is this:

See the size of a ppt file
Compress the pictures
Save the file
See the size of the file again

Miraculous how 3.5 MB turns to 1.6 MB.

Gives me a sense of achievement!

Am I superwoman or what?

1500 worth of crap!

Mom and I were just going through some old papers and found a bill. Rs 1500. Description. "Crap".

We've bought a lot of crap I'm sure, but never has a bill actually said "Crap"- so in your face!

Turned out to be a bill for a Crepe Sari!!

Sigh......

Smarty Pants!

The annual Goa trip's being planned. This time there're some 20 of us heading out and the planning has been going on for a month. Approximately 150 mails have been exchanged with some as arbit as "why has aj sent a blank mail", "maar daala", "what does your tattoo say"- that being the only content in a series of mails where we're trying to get a headcount, budget count, room count and a vote on north goa vs south goa!

The 151st mail today in the middle of a very busy working day to our mailing list of 36 said
"This thing is sitting outside my office window.... quite a distraction"

My reply:

"Why? Is it singing Hotel California?"

I am now most definitely the most hilarious person I know!

Old Age

Scene: Art of Living Class
Mood: Philosophical

Teacher: (Spiritually) "So, when did you come into this world?"

Me: (Idiotically)"Ummm...20 years ago. " Pause. "No wait, 27 years ago." Pause Pause. "No hang on. 29 years ago. Shit."

Yup....being 29 is now hitting me....sigh....

Sita Haran?

The last time I co-wrote a play was in final year B-school....and it was a complete random mish-mash of devdas-elton john being gay- saddam hussein - salman khan shooting the black buck- you get the picture!

Today in office, as part of the diwali celebrations, we needed to do a spoof/witty take on a given situation- and our situation was the Sita Haran.

So I got co-writing again. And I can't believe how much I enjoy writing these kind of things...how totally random they are...and how they don't even make me laugh after a third read!

Here's the gist of the story.... (Truly for hindi speaking, bollywood types only!)

Sita, Ram and Lakshman are in the jungle and have been sent for the filming of Iss Jungle se mujhe bachao.

Ram is given a task which he tosses Lakshman for but since Lakshman has the lucky coin from Sholay, Ram has to unwillingly go to the jungle. 2 mins later he is heard "Iss jungle se mujhe bachao" and Lakshman decides to go to his rescue. But before he leaves, Sita pleads him not to go because she's scared of cockroaches. Lakshman then draws the 'lakshman rekha' to keep the cockroaches away.

Through a wild card entry, enter twin sister Gita and Sanjeev Kumar singing Hawa ke saath saath. Sita and Gita meet and Sita offers to make tea. As she walks away Gita tells her to make the water is pure....because Gita trusts 'wonly Kent' (True hema malini style!)

In the mean while, enter Quick Gun Ravan who's ho-ho-ho gets Gita confused whether it's Santa Claus or Ravan. Ravan is here to kidnap Sita but is confused by Gita. He decides to take Gita nevertheless. Sanjeev Kumar of course fights in vain because Gabbar has cut his arms off. So in true Tamil movie style there's a fight scene with just the rolling of the hips and Ravan takes it all. So heabd ucts Gita and off they go..

Now seriously, we ran out of ideas for the ending and I don't expect you to come up with it. But if you do, then keep it to yourselves. Cause posting it would mean you're even more arbit than I am!