Thursday, July 26, 2007

Perfect Mornings......vs Mine

I wake up to the rustling of leaves and birds chirping....
I wake up to the hammering in the wall thanks to the construction work going on next door...

....to lazily stretch out and feel the fresh air....
...to jump out of bed........Shit I'm late again!

I open my cupboard to breathe in the freshly starched clothes
"Mom! Is there anything clean I can wear?"

I sink into the bath tub to treat myself to an aromatic lazy bath
The shower gel's run out. The shampoo's run out......Oh crap! The water's run out!

...and gently massage my face with a creamy moisturiser...
...Another F-ing pimple! Dammit!

I sink my teeth into a soft croissant with oozing butter teasing my tongue
"Is this bread toasted?". "No". "Why is it so hard?". "It's 3 days old". Silence. "Can I have some butter?". "No. It's fattening for you"

I let the aroma of coffee take over my senses
I gag on my cup of milk

And I walk down to my sparkling car
That's bird shit on my bonnet again

And head out for a smooth, pleasant drive to office
"*&%%#* you're the one who can't see where you're going"

I walk into office to pleasant greetings
"Out of my way!" "You're late again!"

I turn on my sleek laptop in my cabin
I leap over cardboard boxes to reach my side of the cubicle and turn on my dilapidated desktop...

....to find a picture of a loved one smiling at me
....to find this picture I'd put up on my desktop in one of my smart alec moods....which doesn't seem quite smart anymore!!!




Why do I do this to myself? Sigh...........

42 comments:

Nice New Guy said...

"Why do I do this to myself?"

You mean ... why do you act yourself?

Perfection depends upon perspective. I have woken up in the past to the rustling of leaves and birds chirping, but it feels so movie-like...until you get back to the "Oh my Gawd! 8 'o f-ing clock again!" (wow - real life, real me).

That photo is nice, btw. Something I've virtually read almost whole of my work-life. :D

Oh. Wait. I'm getting late for something again.

Still searching said...

Hehehehe... u cracked me up again! Goodness, where do u think of such funny things!?! :)) And btw, WHO has these perfect mornings anyways?!! Pls to be introducing to me, I'll show them some!

beanpole said...

not bad...not bad at all..maybe you've got your mojo back.

rebel said...

Oh well! I have heard this many times.. From where? Oh my own self! It happens to me everyday!

Probably this shud be termed perfect, bcos it happens everyday to everyone unerringly!

Nimrata said...

funneeeeeeeeeee.....!!!!!
hahahahahahahahahahhaa...

Horn Please OK! said...

"Is this bread toasted?". "No". "Why is it so hard?". "It's 3 days old". Silence. "Can I have some butter?". "No. It's fattening for you"

I COMPLETELY cracked up at this :) :)

BTW, I was about to use this same format to write some more about my Europe trip ... ab you'll think I've stolen the idea from you. Dammit Zee !!

*feels less guilty about stealing idea because of giving ridiculous reason*

JollyRoger said...

LOL!

Frankly every day I wake up so late, I dont have time to analyze anything!!!!!!!!1

Anonymous said...

z, that time of the month again...? ;)

hehe...u crack me up!

ScRiBbLeR said...

"And head out for a smooth, pleasant drive to office"
Oh my ..for me its always,
"Head out for a grumpy,sweaty drive"

Adarsh said...

hmm... perfect mornings ....
aji is duniya mein kuchh bhi perfect kahan hain....
but koi nahin.... kabhi to waise subah aayegi....
BTW the pic is really funny.... :D

IR said...

zee i dont know what you do for a living , you should really start writing for living ,very funny very witty post , yet again

Zee said...

nice new guy....sigh....yes u cud say that.....

still searching...laugh laugh at my expense! wait till they break down ur neighbour's house!

beanpole....gracios...or however u spell it!

rebel....damn that's good to hear...except weekends...

nimrata...thank yeeeeee

horn please...copy cat copy cat! and ur europe blog will never happen liar

jolly...this analysis was done at midnight!

anonymous...who art thou??

scribbler....ya man...ditto

adarsh....yes it was when i put it up...but now it's not...

ir...thank youuuuuuu!!!!! :D :D :D

Bullshee said...

Duddddddeeeeeeeeeee........

We're posting in synch!!!!

I got the tone babe!

F-ing awesome post!

mathew said...

hilarious..that was so creative!!

Cool said...

This happens to everyone.. but the way u have described it is really funny :))

Anshul said...

ok, I think this was pure brilliance!
You have outdone yourself yet again!
absolute cracker.
In Delhi in the last weekend of August; lets PARTY!
Will get Cool to come along as well.

Sonia said...

*grin*

i get up real early, and then laze around the house till i'm verrrry late... and then rush to do everything at the last moment and drive like schumacher to make it to work on time. thank god my office isn't so strict about timings and crap!

maverick said...

hmmm ur mornings r poetic too like mine, only tht mine r more achievable :)

The Black King said...

That is one gem of a pic! Whoever said god doesn't give signs? :P

Zee said...

bullshee...the sync is f-ing crazy! :)

matthew...thanks

cool....ek hi thhali ke chatte phatte

shool......absolutely!!!!!!!! i'm totally game! tell me when! yipieeeee

sonia...i'm glad mine is too...or i'd be kicked out by now

maverick....sigh...my perfect morning will never be achievable

black king...u're right...that sign was totally god sent!

sunblueskies said...

brilliant zee! hilarious! who is describing the first set of lines?

Fuzzy, the Ducky said...

Hey! Lovely! So Different! Just one question .. who's perfect day was that? I thought we all were in the dumps!

wildflower said...

i dunno why you do this to yourself, but this was a very entertaining post!!!

Di said...

:D :D LOL!! the pic cracked me up..especially since im one of those people u cud hate for being on time..always.. :P and the rest of my gang make up the cant-help-being-late type! :)

CM-Chap said...

Ha Ha... Beautiful Buddy... And that pic is just awesome. By the way I usually like to be on time to anyplace..but for past 2 weeks I'm doing what ur doing for ages... Running always late to office.

Zee said...

sunblue....someone who's life is perfect i guess!!

fuzzy duck....well u and i are...but a lot are not! some people need to be on time to glare at those who don't!

wildflower...thank u :)

di and cm...so you're the variety who make us late timers look like late timers! hmph!

Princess Banter said...

Isn't it funny how we get used to this kind of life??? Tsk!

Ash said...

Haha :-)

Anonymous said...

oh brilliant..
damn nice...

my mornings are now abt juggling different modes of transport..
or atleast they should be if i ever wake up early enough to save some cash...
damn nice zeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
im back....

nasia said...

Brilliant!! and also i cud relate with every single line except mom.. do u hav starched clothes..that Only cause i dont stay at home :-)

Zee said...

princess....ya man.....sighhhh

ash....:) verbose aren't we!

LC...you have to start by saying "hello lovely cousin"....

nasia....oh well but if u were at home this is how you would be too!

StandbyMind said...

Zee...
I always love reading ur posts..
I just keep smiling on when I read them..
Same this time...

But I wonder..U have a routine..U get ate for things...
and Me...LoL..Late? Ha Ha..This word has dissappeared from my life!

StandbyMind said...

and ya..wanen to ask u one thing....wheres Moonlight..havent been able to access her page or profile for long..??

Anonymous said...

Hurry Up...
Hurry Up...
...Bay EE
:):)

Anonymous said...

hello lovely cousin
thats not the warm welcome back i was looking for...

chronicwriter said...

how come so many comments? i beg cry, pamper to get a max of 5 comments

Cuckoo said...

Screw the forwards of a 'perfect day'. A perfect day would never include getting up, drives or office!

Btw, one classroom full comments. Keep going gal. You have a wicked style of writing.

pravin said...

On the bright side, milk is good for you. And jumping over obstacles helps keep you er ... fit and fine.

Ekta said...

hahah!
This is exactly what my mornings seem like most of the time!!!....wish there was such a thing as ideal mornings!!

contrarian said...

To be or not to be perfect is also not even a question. Imperfection rules :) .. really funny.

StandbyMind said...

Death is something worth wondering and talkin and writing about!

AInt it!

Zee said...

standby...thank u...no clue who moonlight is though....

BAYee.... :)

LC...muah muah!

chronic writer....it'll happen...u're new...i've been around almost a year!!

cuckoo...wicked reminds me of kareena kapoor from k3g!!!

pravin....ya...but it does nothing to ur senses... sighhhh

ekta...don't give up hope...somewhere someone must be having perfect mornings

contrarian...thanks :)